It's 5AM and I'm thinking.

I just watched Romeo + Juliet again, and I don't know why I put myself through that. Leonardo DiCaprio is the ONLY human I can watch on a screen and find myself feeling the exact same way I would if I saw my crush or whatever kissing some girl at a party. Or something else stupid like that. ANYway, of course this caused my brain to get all mushy, THUS explaining the thought process that followed.

I like to pretend I'm really cynical all the time. Well, I don't think it's pretending. I am definitely really cynical when it comes to cheesy things like love. Ugh. I can't decide if it's just that I don't believe in it, or if it's just because I think everyone else is doing it wrong. I just know so many people who claim to be 'in love' and we're all like, ten years old and it's just such a joke to me. The only teensy little beacon of hope that I have? First off, how on Earth would William Shakespeare be able to write the most dramatic and passionate expressions of love if they didn't exist to him? And for something that doesn't seem to exist, love [God, even using the word grosses me out. I picture Ewan McGreggor saying, "Love is a many splendid thing!" and I vomit.] has definitely inspired a SHIT load of great works. Actually, I think that 98% of all awesome things in this world created by awesome people were created from some sort of passionate love. Passionate love for another human? Good Lord.

See, just when I start thinking, "Wow. I'm really glad that I'm single because how annoying all of this seems," I feel like I'm missing out on a really huge part of life. Don't get me wrong, I still think it's a load of bullshit that you're going to find one person that you're, oh, so in love with and need to be with forever and ever, 'till death do us part. But..hey, I want to know what exactly it is everyone's so crazy about. What is this thing that every single human on Earth is so concerned with finding/keeping/losing/weeping?

..oh, and the cheesy, probably PMSing female in side of me wants someone to tell me how cool I am all the time. And, dammit, sometimes you just look really good naked and you want someone to appreciate it before it's the next day and you're a fat cow again.

Alright, I'll end my torturous post of nonsense here. 5:27, hm. I wonder what time I'll be up tomorrow.

I don't want a title.

Obvious sigh.



I think I have to lay In Rainbows to rest pretty soon, otherwise I'll never be able to listen to it a-gain.

Forget about your house of cards

4 AM blogging just for the sake of doing it.



There is no other song I'd rather listen to at night, baaah. Why is it so good?

PS, photoshoot with Raffi today, yay.





I would post more, but I left my camera in the car! Waaah. So expect a non-4 AM edit of this post tomorrow? Even though I have to wake up at nine for a bridal shower, eff it all. [Non-4 am edit confirmed and handled.]

Oh, we watched the film Breathless in my philosophy & cinema class and I loved it so much! I wish Michel was a real human and in love with me, ha. But hormones aside, it was beautiful beautiful beautiful.



Ps, I wish I hadn't missed Cowboy Bebop tonight! I'm in the mood to be a space cowboy. But today was awesome so I guess it's fine. [Maybe pictures of there tomorrow too? What's the procedure, do I delete this when I actually edit the post? Haha, fml.]

Hey. Shit.



Oh and, a very merry 10/10/10 to all my listeners.